Talkin' 'Bout My Generation....and churches

Speaking as an older "millennial," Christian churches in general seem to be pushing my generation away. Across nearly the entire spectrum of Christian denominational churches, mine seems to be the first generation to refuse to just fade into the crowd.

As children we were groomed to be "the future of the church," treated as its greatest treasure, nurtured, and had so much time, money, and energy poured into us via summer camps, daycare, Bible quizzing competitions, etc. As teens, we were treated as a burgeoning evangelical arm of the church, and even MORE time, energy, and money were poured into the youth group, sending us to conferences, more summer camps, miniature theological seminaries, etc. And our Sunday School classes encouraged us to ask questions and have doubts, and gave us a place to be individually and collectively edified spiritually.

But the moment we turned eighteen? Suddenly too much of that fell away. Many churches had college Sunday School classes and/or Wednesday night meetings, but suddenly the emphasis on us as a particular group within the church was gone, and for many of us the previous enthusiasm for church began to taper off. Especially for those who weren't going to college. They were expected to stop being themselves and become "part of the church" even sooner than the rest of us.

This tapering accelerated once we finished college, and suddenly the church seemed to just expect us to fade into the woodwork. After so many years of pastors and youth leaders being our spiritual confidants and support, and being treated like spiritual snowflakes with our own unique beliefs, we hit a brick wall. Every discussion with our new "peers" (anyone in the church over 30) becomes an argument when we even hint at disagreeing with that particular church or denomination's established doctrine, with a strong emphasis by the church leadership that we should stop rocking the boat (as opposed to actually addressing our concerns, respecting that one's beliefs are the result of the whole Wesleyan Quadrilateral, NOT BRINGING POLITICS INTO IT, etc.)

My generation clings to the idea which was ground into many of us from day 1: That one's spiritual journey and growth of belief is unique to oneself.

So when we feel pressure to give up our hard-won beliefs in favor of "the traditional," and pressure to fade into the crowd instead of staying true to ourselves and where we believe God has led us, we do one of three things:
1) Fight back harder, and feel ever more isolated in what is supposed to be a spiritual family.
2) Pack up and leave for greener pastures, hoping to find a haven of ideas and free thought and free belief.
3) Abandon ship, writing church attendance off entirely and looking to our social circles or the Internet for kindred spirits.

I personally have done 1 and 2, and since we moved to the backwater where the above problems are ramped up to ludicrous degrees via the lack of diversity (race, religion, political opinion, etc.) I have been edging toward 3.