Arguing People to God

At least in evangelical churches, there has been a constant focus on apologetics for at least the past two generations, because pastors started reading C.S. Lewis and assuming themselves and their flocks able to argue others to Christ.

This focus includes all of the more willfully ignorant doctrines of inerrancy, creationism, eternal torment, the "rapture," etc etc. and has kept churches devoting huge amounts of energy to training their members to defend these doctrines, to the exclusion of any kind of help for the poor or reaching out to the community in any kind of authentic way.

Of course it has coincided with the evangelical push into politics, which has further crippled any attempts to help the poor (who are treated as moochers and given tracts instead of food or blankets) in individual communities, and alienated people who are not already members from even attempting to come into the church, or Christianity as a whole.

When all you have to offer people is arguments, you can't act surprised when they won't give you the time of day, especially when there are Christians willing to reach out with compassion and share personal experiences of Christ's presence in their lives, instead of launching a hermeneutical laundry list at them.

The best evidence of our faith is our personal testimony, always and forever, because no one can disprove your experiences. No rational person can say "That didn't happen to you!"
And it is our experiences which leave the most indelible marks upon us, which most influence our growth as Christians and as people.

And personal experience of God is no respecter of persons. Whether it's a push in the middle of your chest during an altar call or a sense of peace in the desert after a terrible battle or sudden strength in the midst of weakness, these are the moments when God feels most real to us, and through these experiences we can reach out to others, especially after surviving trauma.

Doctrinal minutiae can be argued 'till the cows come home (as we see 24/7 online), but it's just philosophy if the contestants don't have personal experience of the divine in their lives.

We cannot bring others into Christ.
The Spirit brings them.
We must simply hold the door open.

And the way to do that is not to argue them in, but to reach out, take hold, and build a relationship.

The knowledge of Scripture and one's personal doctrines comes into play AFTER the relationship has been established, or not at all.
And "not at all" happens much more often than pastors are apparently comfortable with, because the Spirit does not follow our timetable.
So keep yourself focused on building and strengthening the relationship.
Be ready to answer questions, but until they are asked, focus on the other person's needs, not on your desire to convert them.